Random Thoughts

Met first goal. Next goal is on the way. YAY.

I can't say that day I am having any "issues" with the weight loss program. However, I might need someone to educate me a bit on the eTools. I thought that I'd done this in the past, but cannot figure it out right now.....I want to track food that I already know the points value of. It is not yet a "favorite" of mine so I can't pull it from that list. If I want to add that food, it asks me to name the CFF. I don't necessarily know this, b/c I've done that at home and don't have the package anymore.

I have food whose name brand (or store brand) is on on the eTools list. How can I put the food on my tracker without having to input the CFF?

Not an issue, but an observation: I've noticed that I eat more for lunch than I do for dinner. I guess that's good. I don't have many points left for dinner. For the most part, that seems to be ok. I'll be glad when someone eats the last of those chocolate chip cookies on my counter. (NOT me, silly)

Here is another thought: Hockey game food. Points on a hotdog? nachos? beer? ooooo, that might be hard. Gotta be good for that night. YIKES. I love that stuff.

Today's diddy: "If you surrender coopletey to the moments as they pass, you live more richly those moments." Anne Morrow Lindbergh

SECRETS to be told that help keep me MOTIVATED

The things I am about to tell you are personal. I will not share this at a meeting, because it is not the WW way. It is not what I would recommend. It is what is working for me now to lose these few pounds I've gained in the past several months. In addition, I have my WW JOB to keep me accountable. The secrets revealed are what kept me accountable when I had a manager who wasn't.

NOTE: I am having a "no hold barred" attitude with the blog this time. If you get offended easily or have a weak stomach, this is not for you. Getting this out helps me. If it helps you too, then great.

Things for me are different now than when I lost my weight as a non-service provider. I'm not sure why; they just are. One difference is that when I was losing my weight "back in the day", I did NOT have a scale at home. The main reason for that is holds true for today; I get going good at the beginning of the week then in my head I know that I can do it. So, I stop. I have no justification for this. I full-well know that if I did not have the scale, I would go-go-go until weigh-in day.

The other difference is that I weigh myself in the morning AND at night. Now this started not because I thought I would lose weight from morning to night, but for another reason....I AM a NERD. I was told by a former leader that what I ate today would affect the scale 2 days from now. Here began my weight-tracking. It started off innocent....just once a day. I wanted to see if that really did happen. If I ate horrible on Tuesday, did it really show up on Thursday? Well, for me it depends on WHEN the horrible happened. If it was in the morning then it showed on the scale the next day. If it happened in the evening then it may not show up for 2 days.....Just depended on WHAT I consumed. Alcohol would appear in the morning.

Then this innocent tracking turned into, "wonder how much different my true morning weight is from my evening weight." So, again I began tracking this. Now I track morning and evening weight. Now, I am no ordinary nerd. I have lots of data from this. I could tell you what day of the week is best for me to weigh-in (it is NOT Saturday, BTW). I could tell you what happens to my weight on my "feminine" week. I could tell you that on mornings when I had a decent sleep, I had a better weight loss.

Therefore, this was not me wanting to "go against my own directions" I give to you, but I was data collecting. Good for my mind. Helpful later.

How do these secrets I've shared with you help keep me motivated? I'll tell you. Last year after the launch of the Momentum program I was pumped. I wanted to lose weight. I wanted to look good. I wanted to be sexy. What kept me going everyday was setting mini-goals. My first goal was to get my "nighttime weight" below 155, say. Knowing that if I did that, I would be close to being below that same number for my "morning weight". Next goal: be below 155 in the morning, then 150 at night, 150 in the morning, 145 at night,.....you get the idea. I was setting and achieving mini-goals at least once (sometimes twice) a week.

I NEEDED THOSE MINI-GOALS to keep me going. At this point in my life, I need all the help and motivation I can get. I have something to work towards and the reward is just around the corner.

Tracey commented (the comments are awesome, keep them coming) that she may need to hear something on self-motivation. The other thing that helped me stay motivated was taking the very small sticky notes and placing them EVERYWHERE around my house. They were IN the freezer, IN the cabinets, on the OUTSIDE of the cabinets, ON my computer screen, ON my mirror, ON the outside of the fridge,....(forgetting anyplace KL?). EACH sticky note had my ultimate weight goal on it in big numbers. There was not a place in the house I could go without seeing that number to remind me of what I wanted to accomplish.

Guess I should do that again.

Today's diddy: "Don't wait for extraordinary opportunities. Seize common occasions and make them great." Orison Swett Marden

Love in Losing,
Jenny

Surprise!!!

Despite feeling defeated yesterday, I had a small success today (already). I am down a bit.

Yesterday, I thought I did so great with the tracking thing and all. And I did. I even logged in to eTools just before I went to bed. I wanted to make sure my numbers were accurate. What happened though, was I used the eTools information to get my points values. One of which was this caramel dipping stuff I used with my apple. ETools told me it was 3 points, but when I got home I used my calculator on it and it was 5 points. HOLY COW.

I did not add it to my tracker last night, because I felt defeated and worn down. I was ready to give up. However, I'd worked too hard that day to gorge, which is what I wanted to do. Instead, I got busy and soon feel asleep. I did not go to bed hungry, but I am not convinced that I felt "satisfied".

So this morning I wake up and step on the scale. To my surprise, I decreased my weight a bit. Not a lot, just enough to give me the strength and the courage to continue on. So, on I go....

This morning I am home from work with a sick little girl. Being home is hard for me sometimes. There is so much here that I would love to eat. It's not all good-for-me foods. Everything in moderation, and most of it is for my kids. So, my next quest is to find something that I would like to eat for breakfast besides the delicious orange I ate. (Did you know that the mini oranges on the electronic scale weigh in at 0 points? Two of them equal one point.) Hummmmm.

Hope you find this helpful. What is helpful for me is if there is at least one comment on each blog. It keeps me going. Love to hear from you.

Today's diddy: Keep the program working in your daily life. Just because you think you had a bad day does not mean that's what will show up on the scale.

Love in Losing,

Jenny

I'm Baaaaack. Not for the weak. Please no judging.

Ok. So here's the deal. I need to get back to where it all began.

I have been maintaining this weight I have for quite a few months now. I am within the range that Weight Watchers has set forth for someone of my height. All my clothes still fit. Nothing is really wrong. But I have some thoughts:

My life has changed in a big way in the past 6-7 months. I want to feel good and look good. I want that "hot woman" feeling back. So, I've decided to get back to basics. My three month journal is open and dated. I actually wrote in it today. I've located my eTools user name and password. I logged all of my intake for the day. And I'm back on the blog.

I am determined to lose these 9 pounds that I've gained since the separation started. I know it does not sound like a lot, but it has made a difference. I used to be able to pick my clothes out the night before based on weather. Now I have to see how "fat" or "skinny" I will feel in the morning. I don't want to do that anymore.

I've been determined since I woke up Saturday. Started the day well. Ended the day well. Not sure what happened to Sunday. Oh yes, I do. No tracking. I could not tell you why I didn't. Just didn't happen. I suppose in the back of my head I knew that I lost a bit from Saturday to Sunday, so tracking did not matter. Well YES IT DOES.

Not only that, but I had a friend over for dinner Sunday night. A fellow WW member. We got to talking about pantyhose. She doesn't like them b/c you can't see her pretty pedicure. I don't like them b/c the top seems to fall over the "fat rolls" and bunch up causing a nice "ring around my waist" by the end of the day. Not to mention how simply uncomfortable they are by the time I get home. She said to me in regards to the "fat roll" comment, "Oh, I don't have that problem."

She doesn't. She's a VERY good lifetime member. Follows the program. Counts her points. Uses eTools daily. Excersises.

Well, damn it! I'm not going to have that problem anymore either. I am going to be a good role model.

Today's diddy: Love others. Live for yourself.

Love in Losing,
Jenny

Monday's Post is on Our Story.....

I dunno why that happens. I suppose that I should pay more attention to things.

You wanna know what I found out today? Adrenaline makes me less hungry. I got all worked up today and could hardly eat. I had eaten breakfast already--a banana and a yogurt. By the time lunch arrived all I could muster was the container of fruit that I brought....skipping the veggies and pasta leftovers. That was good.

The faculty meeting however, found me ready to indulge....aaaaannnnndd there were cookies. Chocolate chip cookies. I had two. So, what I learned from that was: don't go to faculty meetings. No really, comming "down" from an adrenaline rush makes you hungry.

Today's diddy: "Life is like a radio. You can't always choose the song, but you can decide on what to listen to." that's from me.

Love in Losing,
Jenny

Lettuce-free Salad

The meeting this week was awesome!!! My heart gets all choked up when I talk about it. Not only are you losing weight and becoming lifetime in the fastest time I have ever seen, but you are also generous with your heart. ONE member donated an entire basket of things for our Relay For Life campagin. Several have either purchased items and donated or given cash for us to purchase things with. Many of you are donating your time and efforts in other manners. So much that I am just blown away.

We may not be setting records (yet) in statistics kept by WW management, but we have exceeded ANY expectation of giving that I have ever seen. I love you. It is truly MY pleasure to work with and lead such great people to their own greatness. Some of you will go onto become helpful Lifetime Members----giving advice at meetings, others of you will go onto become receptionist who help the meeting run, and some of you will become great leaders of your own meetings. Just make sure you remember the little people (me) when you are touching the lives of others.

This weekend turned out to be a good one. BBQ with neighbors Saturday. I was so busy making the food, I hardly had a chance to eat. We ate so late that all we did for dinner was a small snack. Felt real good at the end of the day. Today was pretty much leftover DAY. We had a lot of food leftover from yesterday. Again, I feel good....go some carb that are doing their thing right now, but that will settle down soon.

I went to the grocery store yesterday morning. I bought a bunch of yummy ingredients to put into a salad for my lunch all week. Looking forward to the meals....until I started to put away the food and realized that I did not buy the lettuce. Now WHAT?! What is a salas without lettuce? I guess I will let you know. I refuse to let any of that food go to waste. I will eat lettuce-free salad this week. Whaddaya think?

Today's diddy: Determination won't let obstacles stand in the way.
Love in Losing,
Jenny

Who can do it? YOU CAN!!!

The thought has been creeping into my mind slowly over a period of time. But it hit me like a two-by-four today. It sure was a lot easier to behave myself at work when I was doing the program with someone for a race to the "goal" line. Perhaps I also need to buy the ingredients for salad. I have not had a salad in while. This week I've reached into the refridgerator for red beans and rice, a turkey sandwich on not-so-low-calorie bread, chicken flavored noodles (probably my only good choice for the week) and the very last of what turned out to be a "weak" salad.

Salad day was what I feel like was my only good day this week. In reality, I know that I have had other good days this week. This is just my current feelings toward all of it. My view may be a bit skewed. I know that I have not gained weight...in fact I am down a scosh from yesterday.

I am just a hair under where I am supposed to be. Since I have short hair, I would really like to be a bit more under there. This is all still within my +/- 2 pounds. I just don't want to be THAT close.

You wanna know what is funny? When I was at the top end of my range and slightly above I had some different feelings about myself. REad this. I did go above my +2 for awhile. It was actually +4. At that point, I thought I would feel better about myself if I could just get down right under my goal....so a loss of 5 pounds. Not much, but something. And I did feel better. For a short time.

Now, though? I am uncomfortable when I get close to the -10 pounds mark. Already 10 pounds under my WW top end-of-the-range number. (NOT my goal, by the way.) And yet uncomfortable with myself. Isn't it wierd how different we feel at different weights?

I remember a time when I would tell myself, "you will be soo fat at --- pounds. You don't EVER want to get there." Got there. Not uncomfortable with myself. In fact THAT number is now my secret goal weight......by secret, I mean that I would just like to hit that number once. I am not sure that I want to stay there. I am happy with the current goal that I have. Now I need to get re-focused and stay there.

I am doing it. Are you?

Saturday we are wearing workout close for a new promotion. Wear yours too.

Today's diddy: Only you can control you. Be responsible.

Love in Losing,
Jenny